Who Made You the Judge of Me - Oh, that’s Right I Used To!!!

December 20, 2014

Whether you are consciously aware of them or not, each and everyone of us has non-negotiable core values, things that are truly important and of value to you, they are what you need in order to live your life authentically, in integrity with who you are, so that you feel energised, happy and feel good in all areas of your life.  They are different for each of us, with some of the most common core values being  love, happiness, family, kindness, success, peace, justice, respect, wisdom, acceptance, wealth, friendships, joy, status and health.

 

Some of my highest core values are ‘love’ and ‘integrity’, so a few month ago I was sitting with a friend talking through the process I wanted to walk my clients through in a program called ‘Shifting the Shit’ to help them look at the ‘shadow’, fears, limiting beliefs and sabotage patterns which might be holding them back from achieving what they desire in life.  To be in alignment with the program, I  decided to actually walk my talk and start Shifting the Shit for myself personally around romantic intimate relationships....

 

Now I am sure that there are many of you out there, men and women, who have experienced judgements from others around your physical appearance and how we ‘should’ be a certain weight in order to be seen as beautiful, attractive and healthy.   Well today the Universe gave me a massive insight into how I had allowed others to make judgements about my physical weight and appearance, about how attractive I am, how healthy or unhealthy they perceived me to be etc etc. 

 

In my younger years I was a swimmer, butterfly was my favourite, I would get out of bed at 5am almost every morning go and train, looking at a long thin black line for what felt like hours.  I continued this up until I was around 15 or 16 when I made the decision that time with family, friends and doing other things that bring me joy was of more value and more important.  When I stopped training I was getting into a size 8 and I recall a number of boys from school at the time calling me fat....now how on earth a healthy, fit and well young lady who was in size 8 clothing was fat I will never ever understand!! At the time I was not confident, especially around males, so I allowed this experience in combination with a number of other factors to affect me in a negative way and I began to eat to cover up my emotions.  By the time I was in my mid-20s my weight ballooned and I was getting very very close to the 100kg mark, not great for my confidence or in terms of relationships with men as you can imagine.

 

Throughout the last few months and this week in particular, I have been unexpectedly and for what seems like no apparent reason, presented with situations where I have been judged, publically and privately, sometimes by people I know and at other times by people I have never even meet or spoken a word to before.    Now I understand the way that the Universe and the Law of attraction works....it brings us people, situations and events to help us learn and grow into more of our authentic selves by shifting some of the shit that we may have taken on (consciously or unconsciously) over the years which no longer serves us.  Well today the Universe showed me a reflection and helped me to shift something that has been within for a long time....almost 25 years to be precise! 

 

Today the Universe presented me with a beautiful opportunity to see how I had taken on other people’s judgements of how I should look, physically, particularly around how in some people’s eye’s having a little extra weight on the body means that I do not value health or that I am unhealthy!  Now at a size 12 (medium), an average size for a lot of women, particular of my age.  After almost 30 days on a detox program eating the same foods (for a variety of reasons) and a conversation where I was told by someone who agreed to support me in dropping weight, that I needed to make more time and space for researching different meals and if I didn’t it meant that I clearly didn’t value my health, as you can imagine I was a little pissed off!!!!   I felt incredibly judged, disrespected and devalued and my first thought was who the f&%k made you the judge of me???? 

 

Rather than go into my old pattern about this, rather than feed the story, or give energy to it, I was aware that I was being showed a reflection of the old beliefs and judgements of my weight and the size I should or should not be in order to look and feel beautiful.   These were all things within me that needed to be shifted, so I decided to make a different choice.....

 

Today I understand that I had allowed myself to take on other people’s ‘shit’ and take responsibility for having given others the power to judge me as attractive and beautiful based on one external factor, a physical number on the scale, my weight, when in truth what is of real value is unconditional love, kindness, acceptance and joy!   I am incredibly grateful to be very healthy, fit and well and choose to be comfortable in the skin that Spirit has given me and the size that I am.....Today I choose to focus on the fact that I have successfully dropped 5-6kg, between 3-8cms from my physical body, I also choose to focus on LOVE and acceptance of me exactly as I am!

 

Remember that we are each a part of Spirit, the Universe, God or whatever you choose to refer to it as, and are therefore a reflection of each other, so when you judge another you are in fact judging yourself, Spirit, the Universe, God.  I so love the way the Universe works to help us ‘Shift the Shit’ that we have consciously or unconsciously taken on.....

 

You are a perfect reflection of the Divine exactly as you are!

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